blogs ARE forever.

new blog! - http://leemar.wordpress.com

2009-05-30T10:23:00.000-07:00

lee and I have a new blog!!!!

http://leemar.wordpress.com

Check it!!!

The Best Job in the World, Island Caretaker

2009-01-26T08:32:00.001-08:00

One of my top life ambitions involves creating home videos for internet contests. Over the past weekend, Jordie and I successfully completed an entry video which will most likely result in a future job.

Tourism Queensland of Australia has recently posted a job, available only through video applications. In 60 seconds or less, you must explain why you should be chosen for the position of blogger and outdoorsman.

The responsibilities of this job include:
• blogging weekly, with videos and photos
• traveling the islands of the great barrier reef, organized by Tourism Queensland
• occational interviews with the media
• sampling spas
• snorkeling
• feeding the fish
• cleaning the pool
• collecting the mail

Duration: 6 months (July 1 - Jan 1)
Return airfare will be provided.
Every video entry will be available to view on the website.
Apparently 200,000 entries were submitted in the first 24 hours after the job was posted.

Jordie and I failed to read the objectives of the video entry until after we created the video. Nonetheless, I’m pretty sure we’ve got the job. See for yourself.

we are really good at hip hop.

2008-04-08T12:06:00.000-07:00

this is the result of a semester of hip hop classes. thank you, april!

the mole application process

2008-02-10T22:39:00.000-08:00

It is official. I have submitted my application and audition tape to THE MOLE Casting Department.

I have always been in LOVE with The Mole. I LOVED it when I watched it in 8th grade during its debut. I LOVED it when I purchased the first season on DVD and binged with Jordie Poncy last summer. I LOVED it when I persuaded Lee to watch the entire first season last Monday night. Really, what’s not to LOVE?

It has been my dream for some time now. Anytime Jordie and I begin talking hypothetically about our future - whether plans to invent a time machine or plans to move to an exotic island after we graduate so we can renovate a decrepit house – somehow EVERY conversation reverts back to The Mole. It’s really quite bizarre how often our goal of being on The Mole comes up. We are to the point where we talk in terms of “Mole”.

Jordie: How moley would I be if I made a video for Delta with Matt Hanson and not you and never mentioned it?
Anna Marie: Soooo moley. Thank goodness you would never do that!

Jordie: If I could have any super power, I would want mind control.
Anna Marie: REALLY!? You really ARE slytherin!
Jordie: What?! I don’t think that’s a mole move at all.

Anna Marie: What are you dressing up as for Halloween?
Jordie: I can’t decide. Either a piece of candy corn or a mole.

Anna Marie: What’s a good prank I could play on some people? I need your noggin.
Jordie: How 'bout this: put baby powder in under their door crack when the door is closed. Then, from outside, put a blow-dryer to it, dusting their whole room in a suspicious white powder. That, or kill their pets.
Anna Marie: That’s brill. You really ARE a mole.

Jordie: They should make a season of the mole where everyone is from the same family and one is the mole.
Anna Marie: After we both graduate, wanna make our own mole?... We can organize with friends and make up sweet missions. Who should we make the mole? It can't be one of us, cause we have to be the clever hosts.
Jordie: You know who would be a terrible mole?
Anna Marie: Who?
Jordie: Adam Martin. He would stop in the middle and ask the producers questions about the theory behind what he is supposed to be doing and then laugh when he realized that he’d given himself away.

I had been checking the ABC website persistently for weeks when they finally posted it – “Casting for the Mole”. I couldn’t believe my eyes. Jordie and I could make our dreams a reality! We had 7 days to get our videos in.

Turns out Jordie caught the plague and couldn’t make a video.
WHAT A BUMMER.
As opposed to working in advance, I waited until the day the audition tape was due to get started on editing and filling out the 19 page application, which included a cryptic legal statement.

I spent an entire day of dressing in monochromatic outfits, camouflaging myself with familiar objects around campus, and being filmed. I was observed and questioned by many-a colleague as to why I was dressed in such a manner and why I had a camera. Each time I explained – I knew that it would result in either a complete loss or gain of all respect. This is pretty much my litmus test for life.

Of course, the day the video was due – there WOULD be a 5 hour staff training session in the computer lab, forcing me into a 30 minute power editing session, before getting kicked out of the media lab when an unexpected class showed up. Regardless, I am content with the “homemade” feel of the video. I also had to sing all the songs from The Mole, since I signed that I didn’t use anything that was copyrighted.

Highlights from the application:
[Most of these came from a 2am brainstorming session with Lee and Mary Gearing, so they deserve much of the credit.]
• Do you own The Mole on DVD?
Heck yes!

• Would you consider yourself a fan of the show?
Heck yes!

• Describe yourself in one word.
Stealthy.

• Have you ever let your teammates down?
At age 4 while playing t-ball, I lost the entire game for my team, the Dodgers.

• What are you afraid of? What makes you nervous?
I am deathly afraid of ladybugs. They attacked me once. Jonathon Taylor Thomas makes me very nervous.

• What is the wildest thing you’ve ever done?
I once duct-taped my teacher to a wall.

• The competitor on this show should have skills in strategy in order to win. Explain why you think you could win.

• Who is the most important person or persons in your life? Why?
This is toss up between my family and Jordie Poncy. Why? My family is incredibly supportive of everything I do, and Jordie tells great jokes.

• If you could have one person visit you during the show, who would it be and why?
Lee Mimms. Because she paid me to say that. And she’s half Belgian.

• If you were selected to be “The Mole”, why do you think you could outsmart your competitors?
Let’s just say – I know linear algebra.

• Tell us how you deal with conflict and adversity in group situations.
I generally place my hands over my ears. This is followed by repetitive screaming.

• What is the biggest lie you’ve ever told?
I am related to The Notorious B.I.G.

• Which would you prefer to be: “the mole” or a competitor?
Honestly, I would prefer to be the host.

• Have you ever appeared nude in any magazine, publicly disseminated photographs, advertisements, or on the internet?

• Do you currently use recreational drugs?

• Tell us 3 surprising things about yourself or your past that most people do not know.
1. I played the role of Tecumseh in my 3rd grade play.
2. I settled Catan.
3. I would rather be rich than stupid.

• Besides the end prize, what is your motivation to be on this show?
In the wise words of Jordie Poncy, “Do [I] really want to live the rest of my life wondering what it would have been like to win The Mole?!?!” Jordie is my motivation for winning all the dough.

• I warrant that all music involved in the application is free from copyright. [Why do you think I sang the mole theme songs? It’s NOT because I don’t own the soundtrack!]

[audition tape posted below.]

how to get famous.

2008-02-07T22:23:00.000-08:00

Chik-fil-a

2008-02-02T16:59:00.000-08:00

[a telephone dialogue between my mom and sister.]

Mom: Yeah, I just picked up some chik-fil-a.
Rachel: Wait, are you in Murfreesboro?
Mom: No, I didn’t tell you? We got one in Shelbyville.
Rachel: No way! That’s huge…for Shelbyville!
Mom: Well it’s not a real chik-fil-a. They just put one in to test and see if we can handle having a real chik-fil-a.
Rachel: That doesn’t make any sense. If you were going to build a Chik-fil-a building, wouldn’t it be a lot more cost efficient to go ahead and build a real Chik-fil-a, as opposed to a “Test” one.
Mom: Well, that’s the thing. It’s a trailer.
Rachel: WHAT!?!?!
Mom: Yeah, they just put a Chik-fil-a trailer in the parking lot next to the realty place on Main Street.
Rachel: REALLY?!
Mom: yeah, you have to drive up to it. And take the food home.
Rachel: This is too much.
Mom: Oh, and you can only order like 3 different items, cause it’s a “test” Chik-fil-a, so they don’t have everything the real one does.
Rachel: Are you kidding me?
Mom: And if you order drinks, they have to go in the building next door to get them. It’s gotten pretty popular. They have a lot of business.

While I was home, I requested that we eat there as a family. We piled in the car and headed towards the trailer on Main Street.

Let's just say – everything about this experience was completely fulfilling.

As we drove into the empty parking lot, I saw that the trailer is utterly covered in cow prints. It looked surprisingly well-done... for a Chik-fil-a trailer. Aside from the fact that it's on wheels, these people gave 100% on the exterior decorating.

A girl with a notepad/pen stopped us 10 ft in front of the trailer window. She handed us a sheet of paper that lists the few things this chik-fil-a offers. We tell her our order, and she immediately pulled a walkie talkie out of her pocket, repeated exactly what we had just said, and told us to "drive up to the window".

We drove up to the trailer window. It's at this point that I saw that the window is made of clear plastic tarp, the kind that has Velcro around the edges. So to give us the food, the girl un-velcroed the "window", and handed us our food through the hole that has been created. The next thing I know, our drinks appeared from the building next door. This place was a machine. We headed out on our merry way.

By the time we left Chik-fil-a, at least 5 cars were in line behind us. Talk about beating the rush.

This is the town I've grown up in. I have a lot of pride when it comes to these absurdities. Shelbyville, TN… home of the Walking Horse National Celebration, the Pencil Capitol of the World (let me know if you ever need any), and Chik-fil-a in a trailer.

[see photos]

our first video blog

2008-01-27T21:53:00.000-08:00

I've got good news, and I've got bad news.

The good news is that Lee and I want to video blog, even though we tend to be REALLY boring and not funny in any way.

The bad news is that some perv out there though it necessary to link our first successful video blog, which is sooo boring that it has the capabilities to put you to sleep , to a prospective college student website. And as opposed to copy/pasting the description from youtube:

"our first weblog: a peanut butter tasting",

this person thought it would be appropriate to write this:

"What a Strange Piece of Video There is something almost sexual to this peanut-butter taste test. To do the test, that makes sense, but why did they record it?"

I don't even know how to respond.

Regardless, here's our first video blog post.

joke's on me

2008-01-23T22:31:00.000-08:00

I had been planning it for a while. Stewart Knight’s birthday gift would include digestive aids – a continuation of a Classics Trip joke.

I took a jaunt over to the ol’ CVS, made a beeline to the medicine section, and began to forage through the aisles in pursuit of the funniest thing I could possibly find. It was a tough choice, but I finally settled on Chocolate Ex-Lax, a bottle of Bean-O-On-The-Go, and a bag of flax “pure fiber” seeds. I was satisfied.

I scavenged a re-usable gift bag from a post-birthday girl on my hall, and carried the goods around with me for the rest of the day in hopes of running into Stewart. I called her a few times, trying to find her. No answer. Finally, I decided to walk down to the F apartments and hand it over. After the hike there, I marched up to Stewart’s door and knocked fervently. No answer. “No biggie. I’ll just leave it on the doorstep.” With no tag, no note, no nothin’ – I sat the neon pink gift bag outside Stewart’s door and headed out.

The next day:

24 hours later— I’d heard nothing. I figured she was busy, hadn’t had time to email. Worst case scenario – she didn’t know it was me. Implausible. The wait was KILLING me because I have the patience of a goldfish in such situations; I resolved to call her up:

Stew: [picking up the phone] Hello.
AM: Hey Stew! Did you get your bday gift I left outside your door yesterday?!?!
Stew: No.
AM: Wait. You didn’t get the gift bag outside of your apartment yesterday?
Stew: No. one of my roommate’s probably picked it up, thinking it was theirs.
AM: Which floor do you live on?
Stew: the 3rd floor.

My stomach dropped. And that’s when I realized – I had left a bag of laxatives OUTSIDE THE WRONG DOOR... a door of unknown residents…on the 2nd floor… And I was going to have to be the bigger person and go ask for my laxatives back.

A full 27 hours after the initial visit to “stewart’s apartment”, I scuffled back to the door, dragging Lee along as moral support, realizing this time that the names of the residents were posted clearly from the outside. I knocked gingerly, and a girl named Anna answered. I said, “did you guys receive a bag of laxatives?.. yadda yadda.” It was one of the more embarrassing moments of my life.

Needless to say, I made 5 new friends that day. All of which now refer to me as: the girl who left us the laxatives.

the return of the mole, a reality tv series

2008-01-08T12:17:00.000-08:00

gchat b/w jordie poncy and anna marie smith.

Detective McGoogles: the mole is back!!!!
this message will self destruct
Detective McGoogles away message: Detective McGoogles: Thanks for the pep talk. Jess: It's not pep. It's reality. Detective McGoogles: You mean, celebreality.
Agent Deelishis: i know!! im sooo stoked!
Detective McGoogles: you have to help me get picked to be the mole
i have never wanted to do something more in my life than be picked as the mole
Agent Deelishis: and ill be on the show and pretend to not know you
Detective McGoogles: yes!
Agent Deelishis: and we can work together, ill win the mill, and maybe ill give you some
Detective McGoogles: half
Agent Deelishis: some
Detective McGoogles: some half
Agent Deelishis: some of the mill
hahahahah
Detective McGoogles: I love that are are already arguing
Agent Deelishis: me tooo!
Detective McGoogles: that is sooooo mole like
Agent Deelishis: dude we were made for this
Detective McGoogles: MADE for this
Agent Deelishis: it's so REAL
Detective McGoogles: so real
if i don't get to be the mole, i'll die
Agent Deelishis: i havent read up much on it yet - where are they taking us?
Detective McGoogles: i don't know. i'm assuming they'll tell me before they tell you since i have to be in on it
Agent Deelishis: thats fair
Detective McGoogles: so i'll tell you when they let me know
totally fair
Agent Deelishis: perfect. i am so good at being secret and stealthy
Detective McGoogles: me too, but you wouldn't think i am which makes it work
Agent Deelishis: and our hometowns make us look so NOT-friends
EVERYTHING is in our favor here
Detective McGoogles: i know
Agent Deelishis: since the first mole was a girl, they're totally picking a guy thus time
Detective McGoogles: like me
Agent Deelishis: suresuresure
Detective McGoogles: sure sure sure
when we are on the show, we have to pretend that we just made that up
Agent Deelishis: like a week in
we can't talk for the first week really
it would be suspicious
Detective McGoogles: no we can't
but we can begin to laugh at the same things to make our friendship appear inveritable, even in its nascent stages
Agent Deelishis: totally
Detective McGoogles: this is going to be soooo coool!
Agent Deelishis: i just can't wait!
Detective McGoogles: me either. you should act suspicious.
so they suspect you
like the season one winner did
Agent Deelishis: suresuresure
Detective McGoogles: sure sure sure
Agent Deelishis: that will be perfect!
SHOOT!
Casting and pre-production have begun on the show, which will likely start shooting later this spring. ABC is looking to run "The Mole" this summer, reports Variety.
Detective McGoogles: maybe its not too late
who can we contact
tell them its an emergency
Agent Deelishis: ANDERSON COOPER.
Directly.
Detective McGoogles: he's not doing it though
i thought of that
Agent Deelishis: still, he has in's
Detective McGoogles: truth
Agent Deelishis: weve gotta contact him
Detective McGoogles: who else!
let's call abc
seriously
we cannot let this slip
Agent Deelishis: im on it... doing research on #s now
joponcy: its too awesome
please please please
Agent Deelishis: holy moly!
joponcy: what?
Agent Deelishis: if you can't be the mole, ive found the role for you (maybe us)
"We're looking for someone in the Anderson mode, a little mysterious but full of comedy," he said. "It could be a breakout role for someone."
as host!!!!
we could double host it!!!!!!
joponcy: ahhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
make it happen!!!!!!!!!!
we have to get at least me but hopefully us to host!
then we are both guaranteed to stay the whole time!
how do we apply
how how how!
Agent Deelishis: it’s only fair, if you mention my name hella often
Detective McGoogles: all the time
literally
Agent Deelishis: good. ill let you beat me then. for host.
Detective McGoogles: YES!
one down, everyone else to go
how can i apply
Agent Deelishis: i found it! hold on
Detective McGoogles: i am so serious about this
Agent Deelishis: http://www.realitytvworld.com/news/mole-3-auditions-announced-196.php
Detective McGoogles: more serious than I have ever been about anything
Agent Deelishis: SHOOT! the links dont work
Detective McGoogles: ahhhh!
Agent Deelishis: this is torture
i can't take it!!!!
ahhhh!!
Detective McGoogles: it looks like our first mole mission is figuring out how to apply. sinister.
Agent Deelishis: looks like a good task for... wait for it... the mole
Detective McGoogles: da na na, na na. da na na, na na na
Sent at 1:18 PM on Tuesday
Agent Deelishis: i just emailed abc, so ill let you know when they reply
i can't find anything on their website, even just about a new season, so that means casting hasn’t started yet, im sure
we're totally in.
Sent at 1:30 PM on Tuesday
Agent Deelishis: im going to blog this.
Sent at 1:34 PM on Tuesday
Detective McGoogles: nice. but change our names so the plan is not revealed.

war and peace

2007-11-05T23:52:00.000-08:00

War and peace.
by anna marie smith and lee mimms.

So it was owen fitzpatrick's 21st bday. He was suffering from mononucleosis, so we threw him a gentle "family dinner", held at the "family dinner table" in RLO. [We like to make jokes about how this resembles the dinner table of a 60s sitcom.] For Owen’s 21st, we went ALL OUT – ribs and cheesecake. A 21st birthday that he would remember. Literally. Since he had mono, and alcohol was out of the menu. All Little hall counselors were present and accounted for.

As we were enjoying each other's fellowship and finishing up our meal, our boss's boss's boss (Patty Perillo) was sitting with us and chatting it up. (She's very nice and friendly.) She exited the scene, moving down the hall toward the RLO conference room/her office. Cary heard her calling very calmly, "Guys. Guys. Could you come here for a second?" Cary leisurely departed to see what she wanted… and then called down the hall "everyone come here, I think Patty needs help.” We sluggishly moved in the direction of Patty and Cary to witness the following scene unfold before us:

Patty stood calmly holding a bowl filled with flames, as Cary stood next to her with a look of mild bemusement on his face. We all watched and wondered what would be the best solution for this fiery predicament. Stephannie McKinney suggested that Patty put the bowl down, since it WAS on fire and all. Patty responded with “it’s sort of hot.” At this point, the flames from the bowl are spilling onto the carpet and table cloth (specifically flames of plastic plate, meaning it's a gooey situation of fire).

Abby suggested we get a fire extinguisher, but Patty calmly said – “no… it’ll be okay”.

We continued to watch the flames grow exponentially. Abby got the fire extinguisher anyway. No rush on it, though. Whilst dexterously wielding said handheld cylindrical pressure vessel, she proceeded to pull the needle out, clutched the handle, and performed the sweeping motion beaten into our brains during staff training. Patty, for reasons unapparent to us, stood silently with her left fist raised gloriously in the air. It was incredible.

The room, hall, floor, etc was filled with particles of smoke, dust, and powder chemicals of the fire extinguisher, so much that we could no longer see each other. [this is an exaggeration for effect. But seriously, it was intense. Plus, it smelled hella funny.]

We chortled as the area supervisor, police forces, dining services, emergency services, and other college officials came to handle the situation. Every time an authority figure entered the room, they would accusingly ask Patty “why do you let them [meaning us] get away with these things?” or “what did YALL do?” [glaring accusatorily] It was funny. And ironic. We proceeded to write 8 similar but different incident reports… it’s part of our job, man.

And that was the day that LITTLE saved Belk dormitory.

2007-10-01T15:04:00.001-07:00

potato, potato?

2007-08-13T06:44:00.000-07:00

Operation: Make Lee Mimms a Hall Counselor. By Anna Marie Smith

As logistics would have it, my semester abroad did not coincide with the majority of my classmates. With this understanding, I knew that many friends and my roommate Mary Lauren would be going abroad during the time when I would be returning from other continents. So I subconsciously started a roommate search.

Throughout the semester, I hung out in kati ruark’s room, preparing for singing telegram gigs. We would collaborate on a song, then show it to a few people who passed through the hall during the process. On one occasion, lee mimms walked by kati’s room. The fact that I didn’t really know Lee didn’t stop me from inviting her in and asking for constructive criticism about our rendition of some sappy 90s song we had never heard before as we danced around in our ushe giraffe and dragon costume, made for 3 year olds. Before this time, the only thing I knew about Lee was her outstanding ability to make dinosaur noises, something that had spread through the campus like wildfire during my freshman year. This was enough to let me know she was a winner.

During post-rehearsal convo, a fun fact about lee arose. She was not planning to go abroad, but rather staying at Davidson her junior year. Thinking it would be the perfect time to capitalize on a developing friendship, I opened my eyes really wide and exclaimed “PERFECT!... WE CAN BE HALL COUNSELORS!” She looked less than thrilled, yet entertained by how serious I was acting.

This was the beginning of something that would last for days… weeks… months… -- longer than I ever expected, to say the least. For the next few weeks, every time I saw lee, I would comment about being my hall counselor partner-in-crime. It became one of my favorite jokes. I thought it was soooo funny to always be ultra serious about it, so much that people around would ask me afterwards, “are you serious?” I would tell them no, but that it was really satisfying to build up the concept, even though it would never actually happen.

I constantly popped this joke. When I ran into her at the Union: [in a ron burgundy serious sorta voice] “Lee, I thought of some hall programs for our hall next year.” Or upon our impromptu encounter at commons, “hey lee. we need to talk. some girls on our hall [eyebrow raise]…” She would join in on the joke, but then dismiss it, with no intention of becoming a hall counselor. One particular night, I stopped by a room where lee was chillin with some other folk. I pulled a ‘hall counselor’ joke, and the others in the room gave a nervous laugh, as though they didn’t get it. Lee even pointed out that “This is the probably the worst idea EVER. I would be a terrible hall counselor.” We laughed and moved on.

Over Christmas break I sarcastically emailed lee asking, “how’s the resume coming along? You are probably finished with it already, but I figured I’d check anyway.” After receiving her reply, I realized -- there was hope. The joke was so ingrained in Lee’s head that she had no other options but to begin the application. I had accomplished a feat I never even expected to
happen. The rest is history.

Order of events: Lee and I both apply. Lee and I are both accepted. Lee and I request to room together during the roommate pairing process. Lee and I will be living happily ever after in Little 306.

--------------------------------------------------------

My side of the story: a counter-argument by one Lee Mimms.

Anna Marie Smith is kind of a legend, according to the walls of Davidson College. Simple whispers of her name elicit euphoria; excitement, trepidation at times. Many-a-time, I’d been told that she and I would get along terrifically (I believe the exact words were actually: “you two would be perfectly crazy for each other” – potato, potato) and I oft wondered who this elusive and conniving creature was.

First semester of sophomore year, I became acquainted with the infamous Anna Marie. She would frequently appear on our hallway, clad in preschool attire, ready to perform singing telegrams in the hopes of acquiring adequate funds for a Segway. One fateful afternoon, I was festering in Kati Ruark’s room when Anna Marie bounced in. The three of us sat on the floor together, in triangular formation, and chit-chatted idly (read: procrastinated up the wazoo). At some point in our conversation, it occurred to all three of us that none of us were going to be abroad the next year. I filed this information away, and devoted myself to allowing my relationships with both Kati and Anna Marie to ferment into something beautiful. I remember Anna Marie mentioning something about becoming a hall counselor to which I politely replied, “Oh, that would be fun!” Thinking nothing of my innocent comment, I perpetuated the conversation with other fun facts (like the human head weighs about eight pounds – Jerry Maguire shoutout!).

When, a few days later, Anna Marie surprised me with questions about how my RLO application was coming along, I was taken aback. Had I, in a drunken stupor, promised Leslie that I would become a hall counselor? Had I slept-walk all the way down the hill to Anna Marie’s dorm and asked her to be my future roommate? To whom am I posing all these questions? Well, anyway, I nervously told her that they were coming along fantastically –when what I really meant was, I hope she’s kidding. Upon future encounters, Anna Marie would ask similar questions or tell me she thought of a great idea for a hall program or would suggest a hall theme. I let the idea percolate in my brain, flirting with the concept of actually applying for the esteemed position of hall counselor. I would always squelch these sprouts – I don’t have the initiative, motivation, or GPA to be a hall counselor. The girls would hate me. I drink too much. Sometimes I listen to Cher’s “Gypsys, Tramps, and Thieves” on repeat. For hours. At the highest volume possible. (Anna Marie, this is actually true. You’ve been warned.) No one wants that to be their role model. I told Anna Marie all of this once, and she laughed it off and told me that it was the faults in someone that are their most wondrous traits. Something along those lines.

Come December, I received an email from Leslie Urban saying that I had been highly recommended for the position of a hall counselor by my own former hall counselor. Thinking it was probably an advantageous move to start a resume, anyway, I set about on that very task. Next thing I knew, I had applied for an RLO position and had been accepted. I think the moral of this story is that they’ll let anyone into RLO these days. Even me.

no flakin on the ferry

2007-06-13T07:04:00.001-07:00

jaw outta socket and laughin

2007-06-08T11:42:00.000-07:00

Don’t make faces, you might get stuck that way.

2007-05-17T04:01:00.000-07:00

[This story may in fact encompass the most embarrassing, funniest, and scariest moment of my life.]

The Classics Trip has been full of really great jokes, one of which had continued since back in Egypt. A system of labeling people as “frail” or “hearty” to delineate any and all illnesses was established by Jeanna Cook when over half the group got sick at the Pyramids. The “frail factor” is based on many things. Heartiness can be innate or achieved later in life. It is centered on a combination of physical, mental, and emotional strength, skills necessary to combat sickness, disappointment, and sheer bad luck. The way you deal with such hardships can affect your heartiness. It is possible to straddle the fence, and you can blame specific incidents on the “frail factor.” For example, if a “hearty” starts to feel less than satisfactory, we might blame it on rooming with “frails” or interacting with “frails.” It’s all about reputation. And jokes.

With said system, I have overcome the predictions of many and remained amazingly hearty. There has been little frail in me on this trip. And I pride myself in my heartiness. When everyone else developed colds, I confirmed my heartiness by avoiding sickness. When diarrhea set in on everyone after visiting third world countries, I stayed clear for the most part. I was even named “one of the heartiest of all classics trip participants” in the last weeks of the trip. My heartiness was pretty impressive. To an extent – all that changed three days before the end.

The trip ended with a week of exams at a chateau out in the boonies of France. Our group rented this manor, owned by an older guy who we refer to as “The General”. Toumazou rented one car – so four people could leave once a day, drive to a nearby village, and get groceries for the group. Other than that, we were quarantined.

Erika Weiberg and I had the luxury of ultimately getting an entire house to ourselves – complete with two stories, nice bathtub, washing machine, stereo system, full kitchen, pool, and a porch that provided a gorgeous view of the sunrise over the French plains. Let’s just say – we were in heaven.

On one specific night, around 10:00pm, we had finished eating dinner and were in the middle of a project – mint tea, hopefully made by boiling mint leaves for a few hours. It was during Erika’s time to stir the tea that I see Chris Vincoli passing by my window on the way to play some ping-pong. I take this as a perfect occasion to occupy the time with my usual leisure hobby – making obnoxious faces. With my face squashed against the window, I cross my eyes, flare my nostrils, and quite frankly look as unattractive as possible for comic effect. All the while, Vincoli shoots faces right back at me. Finding this pastime enormously amusing, I become more engrossed in the face-making competition that I had started. I pull out my screaming-rollercoaster face and go wild with raise-the-roof motions, still flattening my face against the window.

It was about 5 seconds into this expression that I come to the realization that I have lost control of the ability to shut my mouth. I am currently in the “WOW! photo” pose, which I had made a pattern on the trip with the goal of an entire WOW! montage by the end – It consists of yelling the word “WOW!”, looking stoked, and pointing in the direction of something cool, as someone takes a pic. As I turn around, in complete panic at my mouth being stuck open, I look at Erika, still stirring that mint tea. She smiles, thinking this is normal – I make faces all the time.

It was at this point that I realize – not only is my mouth stuck open, but also I have little ability to swallow, much less talk. Panic is setting in, and all I can think is: “I AM ABOUT TO BREAK MY JAW!!!!” Erika asks what happened, and the only motion I can get across is that I opened my mouth, and it got stuck that way. Erika takes this to mean that I yawned. I am in no state to clarify the truth – that I was actually making faces at Chris Vincoli – so I go with it.

I am literarily terrified as I find some paper and begin writing notes to Erika. [luckily I still have all these notes in my notebook, so I can type them verbatim.]

Note #1: Go get Stewart.

Erika RUNS, finds Stewart Knight, who is in the next house over, and relays the situation. Direct quote: “Stewart. Come quick. Anna Marie’s got her mouth stuck open!” Stewart’s reaction involves disbelief, laughter, and concern in conjunction with the phrase, “This is the best day of my life.”

She RUNS with Erika back to my house. Stew is very concerned, yet almost on the floor laughing because I look outrageous. They have no idea how to fix my problem, so we go through a rushed question/answer session involving me frantically writing things on paper.

Note #2: ERIKA! VIDEOTAPE THIS! STEALITHILY! [Up until this point I have videotaped all pivotal moments on the trip – this experience qualified as videotape-worthy, as serious as it was.]

They RUN to get Angela Soper, our resident mother-figure. At this point I have no way to deal with this situation other than laughing. I have mixed feelings that involve panicking from fear of possibly breaking my jawbone, suffering from the pain that is starting to set in (from having to use the muscle that holds your mouth open as wide as possible for way too long), and laughing hysterically because the situation was completely absurd. And everyone around can’t stop laughing because I look RIDICULOUS.

Stewart and Angela don’t know what to do. Angela calmly clutches my shoulder and says, “Anna Marie, you are going to have to stop laughing, or you are only going to make this worse.” My fear and humor at the situation are growing exponentially.

They RUN to get Toumazou, who RUNS to find The General, who gives him directions to a hospital. I RUN to the car, as Erika RUNS to find Anne Horn, so we have a French speaker with us for this emergency outing. Stew, Anne, Erika, Toumazou, and I load up in the car -- off to find a hospital!

Because we are out in the middle of nowhere, the roads aren’t exactly made for quick runs into town. We are moving at 145 km/hr, fishtailing sharp turns left and right. It is probably one of the scariest drives of my life, and not because my mouth was stuck open completely wide. The swinging back and forth at vigorous speeds makes swallowing almost impossible, so I kinda drooled into a towel. I can hardly make the muscles in my cheeks keep going, but I know it is the only option. We anxiously search for signs of a hospital.

30 minutes later, we arrive at the hospital, and after a violent parking job to accommodate my urgency, we RUN to the “l’urgencies” area. I speedily write down my birth date and Tennessee address, and wait outside. They rush me in, and with Anne-the-french-spreaker accompanying me, I lay on a stretcher.

Multiple doctors come in to see the sight, speaking French here and there. One in particular puts on gloves, and puts his thumbs behind my bottom teeth, fingers around my chin, and pushes the bottom of my face with all his might. It’s not going anywhere. Nope. My mouth will not close.

He speaks some French to another doctor, who comes in, and tells Anne he wants to put in something that sounded like a “cathetre”. I was accustomed to absurdity by this point, but can’t help but think “not a catheter!” After he repeats the word a few times, I realize that he means an IV is necessary. They put in an IV, shoot me some muscle relaxers, and get back to pushing on my jawbone. The next thing I know, I’m talking again. It’s over. They take out my IV, yadda, yadda.

I get up to leave and observe that the muscle relaxers have done a number to me. I can’t feel anything and can barely walk. Anne was the only reason I made it back to the car because I have no control over my body.

Once back at the chateau around midnight, my mouth being stuck open is a topic of convo. I still have little control over my muscles, and was told on later occasions that I acted “more drunk than anyone has ever seen me before.”

The next few days are full of video viewings and note readings from that night. It was an unbelievable series of events that have left me self-conscious of all yawns and face-making habits. Everyone else avoids faces now as well.

Since that time, I’ve continuously been poked fun at for having such a lame reason for my first ever visit to the emergency room. And for making faces. And for the implausible series of events of that night. And for various other reasons.

In addition, we’ve brainstormed the funniest places to get your mouth stuck open -- the eight-hour plane ride home and in a famous museum have topped the list thus far.

Note #3/moral of the story: Frail Factor Got Me.

buffalo cafe

2007-05-07T11:05:00.000-07:00

A story from way back when…
Turkey was a li’l draining in that we had been going non-stop for eight weeks without breaks. spring break was in like 4 days. Spending all your time with a group of 22 people has its pros and cons… and let’s just say a few peeps were ranting that they needed a li’l alone time. I proudly announced that I didn’t find “alone time” necessary as long as I had George Michael. (At this point I had been listening to “Wake Me Up Before You Go Go” on repeat for about two full days… and was still going strong.) I really meant it too – anytime I felt too drained from lack of sleep/ long days of analyzing ancient rocks, I kicked out a li’l JITTERBUG, bopped around for a bit, and it worked magic. I mean it. No more being antsy on the bus. No desire to punch someone’s face. It really worked wonders.

After a morning at Ephesos, I spent much of lunch time quoting this song. As we waited in the buffet line at lunch, I said to Brad Bankos emphatically to “wake me up before you go go, and don't leave me hanging here like a yo-yo.” I told Jeanna Cook that she put the “Boom boom” into my heart. George Michael put me in the best mood ever.

[With no real relation to this story, I would like to note that Wake Me Up Before You Go Go is still cycling on my headphones as I type this story at this very moment. I’m just going through a phase.]

On one specific occasion, most people on the bus had conveniently conked out. I had decided to capitalize on my bus time to read some Herodotus, and jammed to none other than ‘Wake Me Up Before You Go Go’ on my headphones, envisioning that hyped up music video in my head. I turned the volume up higher than normal [mainly to tune out our Turkish tour guide who kept interrupting everyone’s sleep to tap on the mic and say, “I would like to recommend for you to look at the green grass to our right…” during our 6 hour bus ride… it had been a long day, ok?] I was doing my sway-snap dance move, as Chris Vincoli got my attention -- the music from my headphones had apparently gotten his.

Unbeknownst to me, I began talking in an excessively loud voice, probably waking up everyone.
Vincoli [laughing]: Are you listening to George Michael AGAIN?
Me: “WHAT?”
Vincoli [still laughing]: Do you have your music up kinda loud or something?
Me [becoming embarrassed]: WHY? AM I BEIN’ LOUD OR SOMETHING?

I was so confused, and I had no idea I was talking any louder than a whisper. I looked up and soon realized everyone within 7 rows was starting to stare… even Dr. Peter Krentz at the front of the bus (more amused than annoyed). And that’s when I realized… I was bamboozled.

Later that evening I checked my email to find urban dictionary rubbing in the experience by sending me “headphone syndrome” as the word-of-the-day.

Entry: Headphone Syndrome
Definition: When someone has their headphones on and they are too friggin loud so they think they have to yell to talk.
Example sentence:
Ralph: Hey do you wanna go to the movies?
Molly: WHAT?
Ralph: I said do you want to go to the movies?
Molly: I'M SORRY I CAN'T HEAR YOU. WHAT?
Ralph. Forget it man, you have a bad case of headphone syndrome.

This song extends beyond Turkey…
April 1, 2007.
Syracuse, Sicily, Italy
Appropriately, the group decided to April-Fools me today. Following Brad’s orders, everyone on the trip united to pull the “silent treatment” joke on me – thinking I would quickly catch on and wonder why no one was talking to me. (Little did they know that I had the perfect defense in place: Wake Me Up Before You Go Go, cycling through my head, is enough of a distraction to prevent me from noticing ANYTHING.)

Let’s just say no one said a word to me all morning… until around noon – when they completely broke down. Toumazou gave a short lecture at the theatre in ancient Syracuse, and immediately after - a group of people called me over, with embarrassed smiles on their faces. “Have you noticed anything today?” Oblivious to their prank, I shook my head “no,” looking confused as I removed George Michael from my ears.

Then they spilled the beans. And I was completely unconscious of any of it. Everyone in the group couldn’t believe I was unaware that I was receiving the “silent treatment,” and individually went into detail about our interactions that morning, apologizing profusely. They each explained the experience in terms of a psychological complex that had developed in their heads, and they had slowly but surely not been able to take the torture anymore - knowing they were making me “miserable”. Chris Beeston explained that he had silently offered me one of his cookies when I asked him what they tasted like. Katie Eastland told me she had carried on a whole “conversation” with me only by smiling. Others spent the entire morning avoiding any contact, being paranoid that I might say something that needed a response. Stewart couldn’t handle it and almost had an early breakdown. I hadn’t noticed ANY of it. By the end, they each felt as though they had committed some terrible atrocity, and then had to just sit and watch my suffering, the consequence of their own actions. Some felt that part of their souls had died. They explained that they had finally huddled and made the decision to tell me, because they all felt terrible about being so harsh to me. Needless to say they kinda April-Fooled themselves. Unconsciously, with the help of Wake Me Up Before You Go Go, I had performed the best April Fool’s joke of the day.

Fun facts about Italy/Europe for 3rd graders…

2007-05-07T11:03:00.000-07:00

-Newspaper is printed on light pink paper.
-Meat is not the same. You will eat no steak here. Even if they have a few cows for beef, it never tastes like red meat from home. And I freakin’ miss meat.
-Instead of regular oranges, blood oranges/juice is much more popular. It tastes different and has bright red juice.
-When you ask for water to drink at restaurants, they often bring frizzante, or fizzy water.
-You will never have ice.
-Lotsa gelato. The REAL gelato test – check to see if the containers are metal (plastic is more likely to be store bought) and make sure the banana flavored is not yellow (that shows it is real bananas)
-Cultural differences include the proximity of people. For example, Italians do not seem as weirded out to be crammed together as other cultures. They are also quieter in general than Americans. Clothing is also a signal to a person’s culture. You can absolutely call out someone’s nationality based on what they are wearing. Americans are loud.
-everything’s older here – architecture, buildings in general, yadda yadda
-everything’s more expensive here
-Bathrooms at the hotel include a bidet – next to the toilet.
-Nutella is a European phenomenon. It’s everywhere [unlike peanut butter].
-Went to Capri, the island. Ate caprese, tomatoes with fresh mozz and olive oil.
-Went to Sorrento, the city. Ate gnocchi sorrentino, gnocchi with a tomato parm sauce.
-Went to Naples, the city. Ate pizza, in the home of pizza.
-Went to the Vatican for Easter. Saw the Pope.
-Hybrid cars and smart cars are everywhere. FIAT is the most popular car dealer.
-Shops/buildings close from around 1400-1700 for “siesta”. All the people take a nap or have coffee at a café. The lifestyle is more chill and seems less stressful cause people break every afternoon to sit around and chitchat.
-Continental breakfasts in Italy/France include coffee and bread. No more hard-boiled eggs or instant coffee served in Greece.
-When crossing the street in Italy, GO FOR IT! If you wait for a break in cars, you look stupid. Just walk in front of them, and they will stop. It’s a cultural thing, and each country has a different mentality on crossing the street.
-After eating at a restaurant, waiters don’t bring a check until you ask for it… people enjoy sitting around for hours to talk, and by bringing you a check, the service feels like they’re kicking you out. No need to rush after dinners in Europe.
-A restaurants, you do not follow America’ politeness rules of waiting for everyone to get their food to eat. People think you’re weird. Food comes out at different times, so ya just eat it when you get yours.
-Getting a cappuccino is a morning thing. Getting an espresso is more of an evening thing, a norm after dinner for digestive purposes. People know you’re an out-of-towner when you order a cappuccino at the wrong time of day.
-people can urinate in the streets with no legal repercussions. No one has to clean up after their dogs either. [probably not appro-pro for 3rd graders, but interesting nonetheless.]
-In America, a li’l gas station sorta place would have a name like “Smiley’s”. In Europe, they like to name them “Tabacchi Pizzeria Bar Restaurante…”

Tunisia
-Just took a five day trip to Tunisia – much cooler and greener than expected. Main reason it was on the classics trip itinerary was for its sweet mosaics.
-Everything is a mix of French and Arabic.
-Like 95% Muslim, if not more
-Very few American tourists
-It’s the #1 olive oil producer in Africa.
-Star wars was filmed here
-This might have been some of the best food on the trip. It was French/Tunisian.

Things to cook:
-Couscous, Tunisian style
-Hot tea boiled with fresh mint leaves
-Arancini – fried ball of dough with rice ragu stuff in the center
-Prosciutto on everything
-Ribollita – florentine bread soup
-Beans with barley and rosemary

Dear Mrs. Bankos,

2007-04-06T03:09:00.000-07:00

[a letter to brad bankos's mom.]

Dear Mrs. Bankos,
I’ll begin by introducing myself – My name is Anna Marie Smith, and I am a sophomore theatre major from Tennessee who is currently on the classics study abroad trip. In recent months, I have become fast friends with your son Brad. Our common interests include, but are not limited to, dogs (similar to Gina), excellent cuisine, and exploring new cities. After a long day of analyzing rocks, we tend to venture out in the late afternoons to find food and fun. On one specific occasion, four days ago to be exact, we parked in a city called Kalambaka, Greece, and decided to mosey out into the town to look for tomatoes and olive oil for a picnic/dinner. Our endeavor led us straight to a Champion Grocery Store’s grand opening – composed of a plethora of Greeks shopping at their new venue for grocery supplies in this outstanding two-story edifice. Not only did this place appear to be a mad-house of our dreams, it also was fully stocked on all aisles with a vast selection of everything that a grocery store could possibly hold, including but not limited to, frappe makers, an optimal selection of peanut butters [unheard of in these areas], and last but certainly not least – hair dyes. It was at this moment, exactly when the hair dye was spotted, that Brad was sold:

Brad [eagerly]: Ohhhhhh…[pause and looking intently]….BLONDE. I’m doin’ it.
Me [unconvinced]: Brad… blonde?
Brad [wanting advice]: Should I do it?
Me: I dunno. Maybe you should go black.
Brad [getting excited]: I really want to go blonde. Let’s do it.
Me [hesitantly]: Well… ok.

Though I had no experience with hair dye, even on my own hair, I figured it couldn’t be that hard. My biggest concern was in the color that blonde dye would turn Brad’s brown hair. Though I wasn’t in full support, I was in as long as I could do the dying. I figured it couldn’t turn out too bad.

We returned back to the hotel room where we thought we could be stealthy and tell no one. It would be a big surprise. We opened the Greek box of hair dye to find three bottles of solutions and directions, each of which were labeled in both Greek and Spanish. Since neither of us know either of those languages, we tried to decipher via pictures… even though there were approximately five total on the page. After 15 minutes of trying to crack the code of languages/pictures, we just decided to mix the bottles that seemed logical and go for it.

Long story short -- Brad’s hair turned orange. I mean, awful orange. Near the color of a lemon-apricot mix. We logically gave it a few days to digest, but there was no change in its appeal. I continually told Brad that I was ready for black when he was. And once we were settled in Italy (after a ferry and a day of four different train rides), he disclosed a box of jet-black hair dye he had dashed to the nearest grocery store to buy.

It was time. Black hair dye might be a challenge – seeing that black hair dye stains skin as much as it does hair – but nothing could stop us from ridding that orange color. I was ultimately careful in my placement of the dye, but as I said earlier, I had never done this before. The solution appeared clear in the bottle, until it settled on Brad’s scalp for a few seconds – turning crazy dark. And my hands are kinda small, so the gloves had a li’l too much wiggle room. Regardless of my excuses, I outlined his forehead nicely, with only a few smudges outside the normal hair area – nothing of notice. Covered the entire head with the dye. It was at the sideburns that I knew I had maybe gone too far. As he was saying, “Be sure you get all the blonde hairs!” I outlined his sideburns in solution… and soon realized it was permanent. When it looked even, we sat for half an hour, watched ‘V for Vendetta’, and rinsed. During that period, Brad transformed into Elvis. Not only was all of his orange hair jet black, but also his sideburns looked as if I had painted them on. Perfect black rectangles.

At the present, you will be glad to know Brad is fitting in with Italians like it’s his job. The black hair was a major upgrade from artificial orange. And Brad looks just like a mix between Gaston from ‘Beauty and the Beast’, John Travolta in ‘Grease’, and Johnny Cash, thanks to the painted sideburns. Italy to the max - you should be proud.

Hope everything is swell in Jersey and tell Gina hi for me!
Best,
Anna Marie

Chips and salsa dancing

2007-03-25T09:34:00.000-07:00

Mariachi bands, chips and salsa, and March Madness: only one of these was absent from Hotel Pythagorion room 207 on March 17. I’ll give you a hint, it starts with ‘c’ and ends with ‘hips and salsa’.

So the basketball-starved Davidson travelers had just arrived in Athens to start their spring break [insert collective dance of joy], while their hardcourt heroes were likewise traveling to frigid Buffalo NY to play the anonymously evil Maryland Terrapins. “There must be a way to watch the game,” they all cried, “this is the 21st century! But where so ever shall we find internet fast enough?” They searched left and right, up and down, but to no avail. They were beginning to lose hope until…

[Enter CHRIS BEESTON, holding an unidentified object in his hand] “Fear not,” said Chris Beeston, raising his arms to reveal something as glorious as the sword of a thousand truths [insert South Park reference] as the sound of angels filled the room. No one could believe it. An actual CABLE that plugged into the hotel WALL! “No more pirating wireless for us. We are destined to watch this game.” They quickly formed a plan.

Where: Chris Vincoli’s hotel crib
When: 6:20 PM (12:20 back home…it’s not coincidence, it’s fate)
Who: Aforementioned crib owner + Anne Horn + Jess Bradshaw + Misters Beeston, young and old + the sisters Smith
What: Davidson Men’s Basketball: NCAA Tournament
With: Chips and Salsa

Well, at least we ironically TOLD everyone there would be chips and salsa…hooray for poetic license. The smorgasbord actually included super jelly pops, schoko bons, tsatsiki, lemon fanta, baklava, and (brace yourselves) cheesy poofs. It was like a fiesta in my mouth... without chips and salsa.

The li’l computer stood proud on top of the hotel room dresser and we all watched the cbs video stream in sheer bliss, at times even bursting out into spontaneous applause. So what that we lost the game? Irregardless, ignorant, and erroneous on both counts. After all, it’s not whether you win or lose, it’s how you watch the game.

Which we did.

YOINK!

[much of this blog = compliments of chris vincoli]

turkish delight on a moonlit night

2007-03-24T10:29:00.000-07:00

For you crazies, asking for my ever-moving address, there is hope. I will be at the Hotel Silva in Rome (Hotel Silva - Via A. Bosio 20/a, Rome 00161, Italy) off and on from 4/6-4/24. You prolly want to allow up to 1 or 2 weeks airtime, so jump on it. jump on it.

present time = Northern Greece.
W 3/28 = Sicily
F 4/6 = Rome for Easter
Tu 4/10 = Sorrento
M 4/16 = Rome

Tuesday Night.
Athens, Greece.
Saw Zach Snyder’s film 300.
Based on the graphic novel 300 by Frank Miller –- plot = Battle of Thermopylae.

Wednesday Morning.
Thermopylae, Greece.
Saw the site of the Battle of Thermopylae.

Movie Highlights –
-Slow-mo fight scene
-the oracle scene, which was filmed underwater
-Toumazou’s [my prof’s] commentary throughout the movie
-the locals laughing when Spartan King Leonidas called the Athenians “boy-lovers” [saw it in Athens]
-movie intermission – all the Greeks took a smoke break
-quotes from the director
• “That’s awesome. That’s awesome. That’s awesome. Every shot is awesome.” –his commentary when reviewing scenes
• “Frank was really awesome. For instance the swords…like in the book they’re really kind of hard to see. So I said, ‘Frank, knock me up a good drawing of the sword.’ Boom, boom, it’s done.” –on working with Frank Miller

Turkey was really terrific. great eats. great weather. great hotel room.
-They Might Be Giants: Istanbul Not Constantinople. Circled through my head for 4 days straight, while staying in Istanbul.
Leave it to Tin Pan Alley to turn centuries of ethnic and religious struggles into a catchy ditty:
-ran in to 6 other davidson spring break travelers
-saw erasog on multiple occasions. refreshingly offensive. very nice.
-“Unfortunately, you did not come at feeding time, or we would have let you feed all our silkworm their mulberry leaves.” -the car salesman of a guy at the Turkish carpet factory
-the view from the hotel was stupendous –the roof top restaurant = perfect view of hagia sophia, the blue mosque, the golden horn, conjunction of europe and asia
-a BBC debate was viewed on tv. why’s this interesting? cause they argued over whether women should be allowed to wear a full head covering or not. one side (the majority vote, ironically) argued this was keeping muslim societies from advancing like non-muslim cultures because it creates a physical barrier. the other side argued freedom of choice.
-turkey is in the process of banning youtube in their country cause there are some vids that insult Ataturk - the founder of the Turkish Republic and its first President.
-went to a turkish bath
-turks have a stupendous sense of humor. they are especially great at pick up lines.
• Are you real? Are you from heaven?
• I have weight loss tea. I think you need some.
• You dropped something. I think it was my heart.
• Friend. My dear, dear friend. I have handicrafts.
• Are you looking for me? I am here.
• Can I help you spend your money?
• I bet your mother ate many, many desserts. Come eat some here.
-a dessert-- named either irmik pie or tatlisi.
boil 1 liter milk. Add 10 T semolina (similar to cornmeal, available at groceries in the states). Add 2 turkish tea glasses* of sugar. Pour half into pie pan, followed by walnuts or pecans or whatev, followed by the last half. Cool to room temperature, then fridge it. or eat hottish.
*Turkish glass is maybe ¾ cup. Made that one up.
-for a finger food – cut tomatoes into slices (2” tomatoes = perfect size). Lay them out on a big plate. Sprinkle lotsa feta, walnuts, chopped fresh basil, and drizzle olive oil and pomegranate juice.
-“but I don’t want a donkey.” –chris beeston in a confused voice, as Greek men pester us to ride a donkey up the cliff in santorini

currently wearing adam martin's socks [from the last classics trip]

2007-03-13T06:15:00.000-07:00

[a comparative study of two professors i have had on this trip.]

The streets/sites of Europe are full of stray cats and
dogs. Everywhere. They are often friendly and occasionally adorable.

To illustrate the contrasting personalities of Toumazou and Dr. Peter
Krentz, I want to describe each of their interactions with said strays.
Their respective approaches to these wandering animals is an allegory for
their respective approaches to life as a whole.

Toumazou - [crouching like a gargoyle, mid-cigarette, letting a stray dog
lick his face, or, mid-lecture, holding cat in his arms and kissing it,
speaking in baby-talk]: "Come here you dirty, dirty animal. Oh, yeah, let me
love you. You’re so cute. You’re sooo cute. Yeah, come here."

DPK - [sees cat approaching during lecture, and pauses as someone in the
group calmly starts to pet it. In a severe tone]: "I would like to draw to
our attention the fact that these stray animals found on the street mostly
likely harbor parasites. As with anything [pause, eye brow raise], touch
them at your own risk."

2007-03-06T21:39:00.000-08:00

The stadium of Olympia, Greece.
Too tired to be stoked about racing, yet Toumazou is hopping around as usual, persuading the idea of a dash as he craftily makes some olive branches into crowns for the winners -- to try to make it real like the ancient Olympics.

We sluggishly take off our stay-puff-marshmellow-man coats and backpacks. Guess you’re only in Olympia so many times in your life, right?

First - the men in the Olympia*. A couple opt for the sidelines, while five of the guys sprint through the stadium at rigorous speeds.

As we watch all the guys run, I was inspired. None of the girls seemed too keen about speed. So I decide to pull the slow-mo card -- instead of taking the let’s-have-an-actual-race-where-we-show-how-outta-shape-we-are route, we should just all run slow-mo without mentioning it to anyone beforehand. No presh on winning. Only slow-mo.

It was crystal clear in my head -- Toumazou would give us the ushe “READY! STEADY! HALOUMI!” [his standard saying] and then we would take off, absolute intensity in our facial expression, yet slower than Christmas.

I talked it up as fast as I could , cause time was atickin’. “Slow-mo, guys!” I could only imagine how funny that would be [there happened to be lotsa tourists around the stadium watchin’ us make fools of ourselves on this particular day]. Others seemed to think the idea was comical as well. I really thought it had the potential to be such a good joke.

To seal the deal, I just keep whispering “Let’s SLOW-MO!” and “Just SLOW-MO, EVERYONE!” to all the girls in a really quiet but fully committed voice. Everyone gives a chuckle of consent and says ok. In my mind, it had only taken moments for this race to go from being a lame-tourist-race to being the funniest joke of the day. No one would ever expect us to slow-mo.

So we trudge out way down to the other end of stadium for the big Heraia**. I’ve murmured “SLOW-MO!” so many times that there’s no way anyone in the race doesn’t know. The atmosphere is a combination of eager to slow-mo-it-up and nervous that I’m not real about the idea. But I make it clear that it’s slow-mo time.

We stand on the old ruins of starting blocks.
Prepare for take off.
Toumazou yells “READY! STEADY! HALOUMI!” [no surprise there]
Everyone takes off, looking in all peripherals to see if other partakers are slow-moing or actually dashing. I soon realize that everyone except for me is bookin’it. Hard core. And I’m running slow-mo in back, but it prolly just looks like I’m abnormally slow. You’d better believe that I’m not letting this stop my joke. Who cares if I am the only one to take this 200m race completely in slow-mo.

I still can’t figure out which is funnier -- the mental image I had hoped for of us all slow-moing. Or the reality of me being the only one to follow through.

Dave Chapelle says everything looks better in slow-mo, and Dave Chapelle is never wrong. I mean never. Seriously.

*name of the ancient race for men
**name for the women’s race in ancient times

2007-03-04T22:11:00.000-08:00

After traveling to Athens, Greece, Shaquille O’Neal was asked if he visited the Parthenon in an interview. He responded, “I went to so many discos that I can’t even remember them all.”

greek for 3rd graders...
Hello = kalimera [collie- mair-ah]
Thank you = eucharisto [ef-car-ee-stow]
Please = pairakalo [pear-ah-kah-low]

Cook-it-up.
-Buy peppers [big long skinny ones], gut ‘em, and stuff ‘em with cheese (such as feta, etc). Bake ‘em till they get all shrivel-ly.
-Also try stuff grape leaves. Stuff with rice, meat, whatev.

Travel To-do list:
1. Travel around the Peloponnese of Greece (including Sparta, Olympia, Pylos, Nauplion, and Delphi) until Tuesday feb 27. check.
2. Drive back to Athens on Wednesday feb 28. check.
3. Fly to Istanbul → Antalya, Turkey on Thursday March 1. check.
4. Turkey
5. Spring break

“Rush out like a bunch of turks attacking Cyprus! Go! Go! Go!”
-Toumazou, speeding us up as we exit the bus

Cloud nin’in it*

2007-02-21T07:57:00.001-08:00

Things that are probably only funny to me:
1. Ate a dinner of four cheese stuffed peppers and spinach kalamari. Took a metro ride to the 2004 Olympic stadium. Watched a Greek pro soccer game – AEK vs. France w/ a bahjillion Greeks chanting cheers. In front of us sat a set of brothers (ages 7, 11, 14ish) stealthily staring at us and daring each other to talk to us, which resulted in pulling each others mullets in a gist of brotherly love.
2. Went to the Greek National Ballet with Erika Weiburg. It was hardcore modern. Paramount moment = suddenly 15 women come out in black sequined mini-dresses and black bob wigs, followed by one man in a black suit with shades. They all began to break dance to rap music like crazy. It was brill.
3. Food for thought: cook an eggplant, like a baked potato. Cut it open, like a baked potato. Dress it up, like a baked potato. ‘Cept instead of butter and sour cream - use tomato, onion, olive oil, loads of feta, salt, and pepper. Eat it in one bite. Eat it in one bite.
4. Threw a “Who Am I?” party with Stewart Knight in our 8 ft x 10 ft double hotel room. Made homemade invitations including stick figures with conversation bubbles. Encouraged everyone to steal someone else’s clothing and show up. Huge success. Best night of impressions of my life. Offered prize to Toumazou look-alike. Toumazou himself was the only winner.
5. Decorated my 8ft x 10ft hotel room. Used packing tape to hang slips of paper reading “throne room” for the bathroom, “lustral basin” on one wall, “mosh pit” on another, “dromos” on the door, “the vanity” on our ugly mirror, “the entertainment center” on the li’l tv, etc. it makes the room seem more posh.
6. Frequent viewings of the movie Wet Hot American Summer.
7. Went to huge pre-lent parade and festival in Nauplion, Greece consisting of montages of people dressed as clowns, Egyptians, little red riding hoods, Native Americans, lemons, etc. laughed till I cried. The good news: beat some kids at catching free ice cream that was thrown from trucks [which were disguised as monsters (…don’t ask me why. I don’t get it either.)] as the parade finale. Bad news: was smeared by euro b.o. as the swarm of sweaty people dressed in Halloween costumes struggled for ice cream.
8. Internet access: Picture this – a group of Americans either perched on the curbs of Greece or walking up and down the street corners with laptop in hand trying keep the random wireless internet signal found on the streets from dying. We don’t call it piracy… we call it opportunity.

*phrase compliments of rachel andoga

2007-02-17T22:05:00.001-08:00

Fun facts for 3rd graders about Crete:
- Crete is an island of Greece.
- It’s the largest of the Greek Islands, 35 miles at its widest point.
- Average 300 days of sunshine per year
- Has several million olive trees - produces 20% of the world’s olive oil.
- The majority of the half million population live on the north coast, where the capital Heraklion is located
- Crete is one of the 13 administrative divisions of Greece
- Crete has over 1000 kilometres of coastline
- The legend of Zeus includes his birth in a cave on a mountain in Crete
- Crete had one of the world's earliest civilizations, the Minoan civilization, named after King Minos (We’re talking Bronze Age here – 3000-1100 BC)
- Cretan kingdom reached its greatest civilization around 1600 B.C.; lotsa periods of prosperity → destruction → rebuild, etc… then finally abandoned for good
- VIP places: Knossos, Phaistos, Mallia (…Agia Triada, Gournia, Arkhanes, Kamalari, etc are smaller sites of importance)
- Archeologists study the ruins to understand how cultures developed. Things of notice include: layout of palaces, jewelry, pottery, sculpture, inscriptions, type of stone used to build, burial sites, location, etc. The possibilities of more finds are endless.

2007-02-17T22:05:00.000-08:00

business in the front, party in the back

2007-02-16T12:42:00.000-08:00

we're surrounded by a sea of mullets.

we’ve got:
-your Jerry-curly mullets; must be fully greased
-your mop-top mullet
-your fuzz mullet
-your punk mullet; pullet, if you will
-your Jesse Katsopolis mullet
-your ducktail mullet
-your rat-tail mullet; centered, minimum 5 inches long
-your back-to-front mullet
[all aforementioned mullets are subject to frosting – aka frullet]

mullet hunting in europe is like fishing with dynamite.

research for this blog compliments of Athens, Greece

prolly the best used book EVER!

2007-02-12T08:39:00.002-08:00

I am the PROUD owner of this used book!!!

Revolt of the Triffids

From the back cover:
LOVERS IN A DOOMED WORLD. For months the Triffids – hideous walking plants whose stings brought quick death – had terrorized the earth. Suddenly a new disaster struck as millions were blinded by a blaze of green lights in the sky. In the ensuing chaos the Triffids went berserk, killing at will. Among the survivors who retained their sight were Bill Masen and Josella Playton. They were lovers caught between the heaven of their frenzied love-making and the hell of fighting the Triffids. Only time would tell if they would survive or perish in the shambles of a world gone mad! An exciting and unusual science-fiction novel. Complete unabridged.
[published in 1951.]

i got euro-ed

2007-02-10T14:45:00.000-08:00

I got euro-ed, guys! I FREAKIN GOT EURO-ED!

On a whim/ dare from Brad Bankos, I got euro-ed.

figure 1: me… age 3
figure 2: me… euro-ed.
I sporadically do things that shock myself. This one is ridic. Yet awesome!

I walked into this random Greek chic hair salon and was shampooed by a woman with a skunked-bob look. The other woman in the salon had a hairdo that fused bleached hair with jet black into a flock-of-seagull. Luckily, neither of these two women cut MY hair. THE MASTER did!

The shampooing woman just kept repeating “just leave it to the imagination,” and used her hands dramatically when she talked. When I asked if she would be cutting my hair, she responded, “No. We will let THE MASTER do it.” [I could only think “THANK GOD!” after seeing her hair.]

I continually confessed [my fears, hopes, and aspirations] to the video camera as Stewart Knight and Brad Bankos cheered me on from the sidelines. The local Euros were entertained as three Americans videotaped the experience. I watched like 5 inches of hair drop to the floor. That’s a heck of a lot, considering that I had gotten a super short cut to last me the four months abroad right before leaving the States.

He snipped and shaved [part of my neck… it was strange]. He spent the last like 15 minutes giving me this asymmetrical rat-tail. [Calling it a rat-tail is an overstatement, but this cut is dramatic enough that I don’t even care.] And if I weren’t crazy, it would already be gone, but I thought, “If it’s EURO, I guess I’ll just have to deal.” The skunked- bob woman even paid special attention to the rat-tail when she Euro-styled my hair even more with wax.

And you know, being Euro is really what it is all about. Being Euro. Looking Euro. Making Euro comments. EVERYTHING EURO! I’ve got 3 more months here, so I plan to crack these jokes for all they’re worth.

As he swept the old me into a pile, THE MASTER asked, “Want to take it with you?” I said no immediately, made a disgusted face, and mentioned to Brad and Stewart how strange it would be to carry a zip-lock of old hairs around Europe and continually hold it into the air as I unpack and repack the bag at each hotel.

I bought a European trench coat without delay to achieve the full effect.

The Davidson folk were truly speechless. And impressed.

Call me EURO-ED.

NO FLAKIN' ON THE FERRY!

2007-02-08T11:23:00.000-08:00

We are currently in Athens (after an overnight ferry) and are just jubilant to be in one hotel for 11 nights. We’ve mostly been doing one night stays, so 11 nights is pretty tremendous. Plus, it means we can do laundry. I’ve worn the same clothes for the past 7 days… it’s delightful… I’m not even being sarcastic.

Illustrations of group dynamics (these are pretty entertaining):

1. I’ve gotten the group hooked to the beloved board game Settlers of Catan (compliments of Rachel Andoga). When we aren’t playing, we are making jokes about who has the sheep port.

2. As once started on 3rd Rich, the “Raise the Roof” game continues. In case you don’t know the game – it consists of:
• choosing one competitor and making eye contact
• putting your hands in the air and raising the roof
• never smiling
• the first to smile loses the game.
Jeanna Cook and I are undefeated.

3. After three weeks of group meals, I decided there was a definite need for more one-on-one time with others. I developed the CID system, pronounced “Kid”, that has caught on like none other. Seriously, EVERYONE is all about having CIDs with each other. CID stands for “common interest dating”. It’s a method for rapidly producing friends. Here are the steps:
• plan to have a CID over a meal a few days in advance, so you can build it up during the intermediate period.
• brainstorm possible common interest to bring up during your CID. CIDs are strictly business. There is no time to mess around. You must get in there and get the job done. I’ve comprised an outline that includes everything from academic background to how you like your steak cooked
• During the CID, work to establish common interests. As soon as one is established say the phrase “Let’s move on.” There is no time to elaborate on the common interests, seeing that they are strictly business. You’ve got three more months to take care of the embellishment.
• allow for an audience
• end the CID by shaking hands and saying “It was nice to have a CID with you.”

Let’s just say this method of forced-friendship works better than you could even imagine. Though I had absolutely nothing in common with Scott Sherrill, except that we are on this trip together, I DID find out that he started a bridge club at his middle school that became the most popular middle school club by the end of his middle school career. Probably would have never known that one if it weren’t for our CID. I also learned that Catherine Knepp shares a love of techno music. And Stewart Knight and I both revealed our affection for Dr. Chartier. And Chris Vincoli and I both want to be Henry Van Wagenberg. The list goes on and on…

A REAL LONG RECAP:
Cyprus was absolutely beautiful. Most cities are on the coast with an amazing beach.

Cyprus is Dr. Toumazou’s home. Things of note:
-Toumazou’s archaeological site (that he leads excavations at every summer)
-The brand spankin’ new town hall / museum for Toumazou’s findings that is like a 5 mill dollar project
-Free dinner from the mayor! of Toumazou’s site’s village. Dinner was meze, meaning we got 12+ dishes, one after another. The dishes included: fresh bread, fresh tomato/feta salad, koupepia (stuffed wine leaves), souvlaki, afelia (meat stewed in wine), klefthedes (fried meat balls), lamb, halloumi ravioli, etc, etc
-Dr. Toumazou’s friend MacGuyver set us up to meet the Cypriot Archbishop. It was a really big deal. And kinda like the “Whose line is it anyway” game called “gibberish” where the archbishop would speak in Greek for a really long time, and MacGuyver would translate it into one concise sentence. [MacGuyver is currently setting us up to meet the Pope. I’ll let you know how it goes.]

Fun facts for 3rd graders… and Kirby Carlock:
• Cyprus joined EU in 2004. Use the Cypriot pound, and is said the have the strongest economy in the EU. This fact could be a lie, but they did beat out my American dollar by 2.25%ish.
• After Sicily and Sardinia, Cyprus wins #3 in size for the Mediterranean island.
• The weather is here. [Jimmy Buffet reference] Seriously, we went and sat on the beach during the day and it was perfect. But at night it gets all chilly. And it snows on the mountain.
• religion = Eastern Orthodox. The Church of Cyprus is an autocephalous church and the Archbishop (whom we met) is the head of it.
• Cyprus is considered the first Christian country, thanks to ol’ Paul and Barnabas.
• we continually ate tangerines, lemon, olive, apples, etc off the trees everywhere. I am also in love with dried figs. Fruit here is heavenish.
• did you know that black olives and green olives grow on the same tree? Green olives aren’t ripe yet.
• The moufflon = Cyprus’s national animal. I think this animal might be imaginary. I dunno why I think this… but maybe I dreamed it.
• Language = Greek. I’d say 80% of my group can read ancient greek. But modern Greek is much too difficult for even them to understand.
• There’s this one rock that is thought to be Aphrodite’s birthplace. Regardless, the scene is gorgeous. Like all the beaches in Cyprus. Water so clear you can see to the bottom. [I find myself continually quoting Will Smith’s Miami.]
• A tzatziki recipe: one cucumber, greek yogurt, mint, oregano, olive oil, garlic, salt. Finely grate the cucumber into a sieve and sprinkle lightly with salt. Drain and pat dry. Put yogurt (drained) in a bowl with two minced garlic cloves. Add drained cucumber, mint, oregano, salt, and pepper. Blend in olive oil. Done. Serve with delicious bread.

Feel the need to understand the history of Cyprus? I’ll fill you in…
• Well, let’s just say Cyprus goes back pretty far. Fist civilizations were back in the Neolithic period (7000-4000BC).
• Order of big rulers:
Roman Empire ⇒ Byzantine Empire → Franks → Venetians → Ottomans → English (1878-1960) → FINALLY BECOMES A REPUBLIC in 1960
• St. Paul and St. Barnabas visited in 45 AD – spread Christianity like none other.
• The capitol moves around a whole bunch and lotsa earthquakes ruin cities.
• Around 650 – Arab raids – violence + the Arabs go into cities and whitewash all Christian icons, many churches destroyed
• Three power want control of Cyprus: England, Greece, and Turkey
• When the ottomans were ruling and at war with Russia, England took Cyprus for the Ottomans to kinda keep it from being involved with the Russian war.
• England keeps offering Cyprus to Greece if Greece will aid in the Great War. Greece continues to reject.
• Finally, UN sets up agreement b/w England, Turkey, and Greece to make Cyprus an independent republic, (which was 75% Greek-Cypriot and 20% Turkish-Cypriot) –
• England: sovereign rights
• Greece: the president must be Greek-Cypriot
• Turkey: the vice president must be Turkish-Cypriot with power of veto on security and external policy.
• Long story – short: Turkey got way more than they should have - the power of veto AND the house of representatives had way more Turkish representation that fair for their 20% population of Cyprus
• Problems. Greeks wanted to it be fair for them.
• The President back then = Makarios. He was a good, fair president trying to keep peace.
• But the Greeks were unhappy with their lack of power. Greeks planed this military coup to get rid of Makarios. 1974!
• Turkey – who had tried to attack at other times, but was previously stopped by pressure from US, England, and Russia – took this military coup as an excuse to attack.
• Turkey attacked and Greek-Cypriots (including my professor Dr. Toumazou) fought a hopeless battle only for the pride of their country. The US and England made no efforts to help Greek-Cypriots cause they were trying to keep Turkey in NATO alliance. Of course, Turkey won.
• Turkey took the top part of Cyprus for good in a de facto partition. Still today, the Turks have not repaired any buildings from the attacks during the war. (Because it would them more money than it is worth to them and because they it shows off that they won the war) One of the Turkish cities, Famagusta, has a gorgeous beach surrounded by a coast of old ruined hotels from the 70s. With armed Turkish guards standing on top of the hotel ruin making sure you take no pictures. And the Greek-Cypriots who grew up in Famagusta (like Dr. Toumazou) will never be allowed to their home again.

Cyprus is just like home...

2007-01-29T12:15:00.000-08:00

Cyprus is just like home. Except you are surrounded by the Mediterranean, there’s no chick-fil-a, and everybody here speaks Greek.

Questions from my mom’s class:

SAM ask-- How many kings lived in the Valley of the Kings?
answer: so there’s this deal (or at least how I understand it):
Kings and rich people decided they wanted to be buried in cool places.
The chronology goes kinda like this: mastaba tombs, then step pyramids (djoser), then bent pyramids, then red pyramids, then the Great Pyramid and others at GIZA, then came the valley of the kings.
The pyramid development happened like this -- kings were like “HEY! I want a bigger better place than the last king - BUILD IT!” so pyramids got nicer and bigger each time.

Then during the pyramid time, kings noticed they were getting looted....everything was stolen little by little. So they were like “HEY! Let’s hide me in the mountains instead of a pyramid!” and so pyramids were uncool and people began to be buried in the Valley of the Kings -- 62 tombs were there [they think.. can’t ever really tell] and 21 of those were royalty – cause anyone w/ enough dough could have a tomb in the valley.

FYI -- king tut is not a big deal as a king. Not at all. He doesn’t really matter. Ramesses II is the most notable ruler buried in the Valley of the Kings. King tut is just the only tomb they found intact with no looting. So that makes him important cause they now have a li’l understanding of what was buried in the tombs. And if there was that much gold in his tomb [he was a nobody who was died unexpectedly, meaning his tomb/riches weren’t even ready for burial when he died] there must have been crazy amounts of cool things and gold in the other big tombs.

SAM asks – What do you eat?
In Egypt we were kinda busy trying to not get sick – we didn’t try too many foreign foods. Though I didn’t get sick, almost everyone else did. We like to call it FRAGILITY FACTOR. A cool something new: Khirkade juice made from the hibiscus flower. Looked kinda like red cool-aid but tasted like nothing you have ever had before.*
In attempt for “safe” food, we ate one meal at a place called Roy’s Country Kitchen, located in our five-star hotel. Here they required workers to wear plaid button-ups and overalls as uniform and played only Johnny Cash music. [I sang a li’l ring of fire here and there.] It was memorable.

Cypriot (pronounced SIP-REE-OUGHT) food has been excellent. Like, you don’t even know. We have eaten at many small town café sorta places. In Larnaca, we ate souvlaki, which is a semi-circle pita sandwich filling with roasted meat, cheese, lettuce, tomatoes, etc., which has been argued as the 8th Wonder of the World. There are strange sauces to go on the souvlaki, one which is a sesame seed sauce called tahini (it goes in hummus too), and another is a cucumber and yogurt sauce called tzatziki. Those livin’ on the edge add hot pickled peppers and celery.
The cheeses here are divine. For breakfast, we usually take advantage of the opportunity to make a tomatoes and helloumi sandwich, on toasted bread. It’s either souvlaki or helloumi pitas for every meal, who am I kiddin?

The coffee here is very strong. You get a nice little 3-ounce cup, saucer, and a large glass of water. Not really thinking, I had my first cup of coffee when we were in Cyprus before going to Egypt. After a few sips, I reached complete grind. Lots of grind. Bitter grinds. Settled at the bottom. Not knowing any better, I decided to chug all the grinds at the bottom. All of them. I immediately regretted my decision. It was AWFUL. Then they told me that you don’t drink that part. And that’s why they give you water. Ever since then, this story comes up quite often. Almost every time we have coffee. “HEY ANNA MARIE! ‘MEMBER THAT TIME YOU DRANK ALL THE COFFEE GRINDS! HAHA!” They call it stupid. I call it HARDCORE.

SARAH asks -- Did you see through the windows in the pyramids?
There are actually no windows in the pyramids. Only stone…. On all sides. No windows at all.

SARAH asks-- Is it true girls could not be actors thousands of years ago?
Yes, this is true. Women really couldn’t do diddlysquat back then. No rights, really. Men played the role of women in the plays of classical theatre.

SAM asks --Did you go inside the pyramid? What did it look like? How many pyramids did you see? What were the carvings like?
Yep, I went inside the pyramids. Well, only one was open. And empty -- cause everything has either been stolen or put in museums. But we walked in and it was like this really long tunnel that was probably 4 feet wide/tall, that finally ended in a chamber room. And had little oxygen. And was empty. But at least I went inside. Here are some really bad pictures I found online. I can’t find any good ones, and photographs are not allowed. http://www.phouka.com/pharaoh/egypt/photos/luxor/westbank/vk/ramesses3-01.html ; http://www.nga.gov/exhibitions/2002/egypt/tomb_vr_1.shtm
The Valley of the Kings, on the other hand, had amazing hieroglyphics and paintings on all the walls.*

I would like to take a moment to fill you in on how ghetto the Egyptian Museum was in Cairo. Egypt was dirty overall. And they know Americans don’t understand Arabic, so it is easy for them to make us pay for things like bathrooms, even in big places like the Egyptian Museum. Examples of how ghetto this place was include: to lock up the cases with really famous sculptures and artifacts, they used wire twists where a lock would go. Sometimes rusty little padlock. I was looking into some of King Tut’s Tomb stuff, and there was packaging tape all over the top of one of the funerary boxes. They also used classy handwritten slips of paper to signal which pieces were “on leave”, though many of the pieces in this museum didn’t even have identification. It was weird.

*A MUST-GOOGLE

a ditty

2007-01-26T13:50:00.000-08:00

A ditty I made up with the aid of friends:
To the tune of “in the jungle”

Me: [making background a capella tune] canopic jars canopic jars. canopic jars canopic jars….
Katie: in the desert, the mighty desert, anubis sleeps tonight. in the desert, the mighty desert, anubis sleeps tonight.
Unison: ramesseeeeeeeeees -he is number two. Ramesseeeeeeeeees -he is number two.
Da dum dum dum

Katie: [making background a capella tune] the breakfast bar. the break fast bar…
Me: while in Egypt, in cairo Egypt, we saw the pyramids. while in Egypt, in cairo Egypt, we saw the pyramids.
Unison: sayeeeeeeeeeeed* makes pretty jewelry. sayeeeeeeeeeeed makes pretty jewelry.
Da dum dum dum.
Baksheesh.**

*Sayed = our tour guide, who makes jewelry
**Baksheesh = Egyptian word for tips

current travel plans:
1/26 – 2/2 traveling throughout Cyprus
2/2 – Fly to Heraklion, Crete, Greece
2/7 – overnight ferry to Athens, Greece

WALK LIKE AN EGYPTIAN

2007-01-22T07:16:00.001-08:00

Things accomplished thus far on the classics trip:

1. saw royal shakespeare company show
RSC may be having its residency at Davidson right now, but we saw them in London – “Antony and Cleopatra” starring Patrick Stewart… you probably either remember him from star trek or his acting repertoire, including those sweet john barton workshop movies we watched in my acting Shakespeare class last semester. Pretty fitting before our travels to Egypt.

2. bought a rosetta stone backpack
Katie Eastland and I bought matching rosetta stone backpacks that are absolutely swell. I plan on wearing them EVERYWHERE. Nuff said.

4. British Museum
the Elgin marbles* from the Parthenon! Wooooooo!
[more grandiose explanation to come when we visit the Parthenon]

3. made / continue to make constant references to mcguyver
for quite some time, I thought this was a code name for anyone who called toumazou’s cell. Turns out – mcguyver is toumazou’s friend who is mentioned constantly and helps work out things for our group while in cyprus. Examples of references to mcguyver include every time toumazou’s celly rings, he dances around and say “it’s mcguyver! It’s mcguyver!” also, toumazou brought in a box and said, “LOOK! Presents from mcguyver for our trip to eygpt! He brought us adaptors and diarrhea medicine!”

4. ate fish and chips
self-explanatory.

5. building up the first encounter of uncle phillip
This was the first conversation he came up in:
Catherine knepp is @ toumazou’s for the group dinner.
Toumazou brings out a jar of olives and says, “try some!”
She does and says, “these are delicious!”
He replies, “Guess who picked them!”
Catherine answers, “you?”
Toumazou corrects her, “No. Uncle Phillip!”
Turns out uncle Phillip is toumazou’s 94 year old uncle. He is 3rd oldest in his village. He often climbs trees and picks olives. Another story includes toumazou rapidly driving a car down the road, and uncle phillip passed him on his bicycle. That’s all I know about him, but that’s plenty.

6. bonded with a middle-aged Cypriot woman during flight to Cyprus. I asked questions and she told me facts about her family, job, and country. Facts learned include: Cyprus population = 730,000; capital = Nicosia; produce = oranges, olives, other vegetables; 3rd largest island in the Mediterranean; daughter goes to college in London and had her quarterly exams last week

7. met Syrian diplomat
after the day in larnaca, cyprus seeing st. lazarus’s tomb, the choirokoita neolithic village, and the ruin of the ancient city amathus, we ran into a Syrian diplomat at Hala Sultan Tekke (the temple for Unn Haram) in Cyprus. he asked to take a photograph with us, then proceeded to invite us to his country… including a free lunch in the deal.

8. saw the valley of the kings*
like I used to see in my 3rd grade ‘weekly reader’, only REAL. We went into three of the tombs – which was sweeeet. You entered in the little hole in the mountain, and after some stairs up n’ down, you reached the all kinds of chambers that were sculpted / painted - imagine: art and hieroglyphics from 3,500 years ago w/ some still in color. LOOOOVED it!

9. Memorial temple to queen hatshepsut*
HUGE! In many momuments women were dressed in male kingly costume, which included a “false beard”

10. mo’ Egypt
Egypt is just what you’d expect, only bigger -- Sand, dust, camels, arabic, men in turbans, ruins on the side of the road, etc are the usue. karnak and luxor temples were amazing.*

*google ‘em! google’em! [optional… but just do it.]

fun facts for 3rd graders about Egypt (… and Caitlyn Culbertson)
• “good morning” in Arabic is pronounced: “SABA HELL HEAR”
• “LA” means “no”
• Driving down the road you can see sugar cane, banana trees, lemon trees, lime trees, etc, etc
• Houses built mainly of mudbrick. Why? Cause they absorb heat in the summer
• The nile is the longest river in the world. Followed by the amazon, then the Mississippi
• 212 towns in Egypt (45% of peeps live in towns)
• 7,400 villages in Egypt (55% of peeps live in villages)
• 73,000,000 = pop of Egypt
• 17,000,000 = pop of Cairo
• there was a shepherd followed by his sheep crossing the road
• two different cultures of Egypt: city culture and country culture
• city culture = pretty modern, like in the US
• country culture = more traditional, ex. = in villages, men wear dresses and turbans
• land is either blue (water), green (land), or brown (desert). 95% of Egypt is brown
• never rains in the south
• education = subsidized by the government
• 6 yrs in elementary school (required)
• 3 yrs intermediate school (optional)
• 3 yrs secondary school (optional)
• university is free
• start school at age 6
• both public and private schools with mostly same differences as in US
• national dress = gallabaya (prob not spelling this correctly)
• most popular color = black
• married women are recognized by wearing black clothing
• single women are recognized by their colorful garmets
• Differences in west and east bank of the Nile:
• East = temples (sunrise)
• West = tombs (sunset)
• Egypt = developing country (can’t drink their water)

LONDOOOOOON

2007-01-16T12:21:00.000-08:00

we made it to london!
[that was for you, mom.]

jetlaggin'.

went to the national gallery in london. saw some monet and other sweet-famous paintings.

i could only think of jack handy:
"when this girl at the museum asked me who i liked better, monet or manet, i said, 'i like mayonnaise.' she just stared at me, so i said it again, louder. then she left. i guess she went to try to find some mayonnaise for me."

W 1/17 London: British Museum
Th 1/18 Fly to Larnaca, Cyprus
F 1/19 Fly to Cairo-Luxor, Egypt
Sat 1/20 East Bank: Karnak & Luxor Temples
Su 1/21 West Bank: Valley of Kings, Hatshepsut Tem. Fly to Cairo
M 1/22 Giza: Pyramids & Sphinx
Tu 1/23 Drive to Alexandria Museum, Library, Pompey’s Pillar
W 1/24 Roman Odeion Drive to Cairo
Th 1/25 Sakhara: Zoser’s Complex & Pyramid; Memphis

carmen sandiego

2007-01-09T13:47:00.000-08:00

Ok. So my mom came up with this idea that while I am abroad, she is going to make a bulletin board for her 3rd grade class called ‘where in the world is anna marie?’

at the start of her explanation, I was kinda sketched out. Way too much focus on me. But then, when I thought of how incredibly funny the plan was – she wants to have a full-length picture of me looking all full-out touristy with my backpack so that the class can move ‘anna marie’ around this ginormous map of the world while talking ‘bout the country, landforms, lang, etc. – I told her that I was in… on one condition: she must play the song 'where in the world is carmen sandiego?' everyday. Rockapella style.

So today I went to meet the class. When they came back from PE, and I was sitting in the room, they all just starred with their jaws dropped. And then I was like ‘hey! I’m anna marie!’ You could tell they were oddly overwhelmed to see me in person, which is always hilarious since my mom has one of those projectors, and every time she pulls down the screen it shows her computer background [a picture of my sister and I] that literally makes our heads larger than life upon projection. [the 1st visit I had after she got the projector screen resulted in kids pointing and yelling ‘LOOK! IT’S THE GIRL FROM THE SCREEN!!’ It’s a hoot.]

After a period of stares, I broke the silence with a ‘tell me your names,’ all chipper-like. My mom always names people in her class, and I wanted to be able to finally put names with faces. One kid mumbles in surprise: “OUR FULL NAME?!” and then it began: Every student recited his or her entire biological name, as if i needed that much info, while nervously tapping his or her foot on the ground as though I were a live monster. Jackson Steven Smith. Sarah Glynn Sadler. John Houston Reed, the 3rd. We had a snack of s’mores and hot chocolate. I became a legend. And then I hit the road.

country hip hop

2007-01-04T06:09:00.000-08:00